Today in my quiet time of prayer and study I had a revelation. God given I am sure since I never have and never will come up on my own something this huge!

A "light bulb" moment as Oprah so aptly puts it. It came to me that the reason why Satan has been after me ever since I became a Christian at 8 years old and has used some of my most tremendous weaknesses and negative issues in my life to his advantage and sadly to say I have fallen for most of them and especially the fight or flight response which for me is definitely flight! The reason is because I am and will become an even greater warrior for God and Jesus Christ!! God is using this time to mold me and strengthen me into someone of great resolve and he will use me in a huge and magnificent way to further his work here on earth. What a great thing huh? I love it, love it, love it!!! Today is and was a good day!! Satan is trying even at this second to try to undermine that and use that to have me self sabotage myself by saying whew!! It's over!! The dust is settling and life will get back to normal. Hmmm.... What is normal anyways. What I did decide to do is let tomorrow be tomorrow and not bring it into today. Be grateful for a good day today and the strength that comes from that. No fears today, No not knowing what to do or where to turn. For today. Tomorrow will take care of itself. Today I claim and claimed VICTORY over the adversary!! PRAISE GOD!!!

Tomorrow a very very dear friend of mine and two other beautiful women from my church will be coming over tomorrow and we may begin to get a game plan on how to simplify my life and get things de-cluttered and organized in my home so Satan cannot hold this over my head of why I am not good enough to treat myself to a day off. Or go out and have a few fun days a week. I need so desperately to get out of my home and do some things that I like, not errands but things that I like to do and also to spend time with my Christian friends. At the beginning of the week I was struggling with this whole process and even letting them come over at all. It is a humiliating process for me. A humbling one at the very least. Well, today Thursday the day before the are coming. I am feeling at Peace over the whole prospect. We may not get much accomplished physically tomorrow but I feel there will be some movement forward and that in itself will be a comfort for me.

Tomorrow is a new day and believe it or not I am anxious for it. Whatever it ends up holding. This hasnt happened in a very long time for me.

No New Layouts Today

Even though I do not have any layouts today I feel compelled to write. I started sharing my journey right now Spiritually and how can I stop now? My hearts desire is that God will use my blogging in some great and magnificant way to touch someone even if it is just one person. Just so that they know they are not alone. The horrifying feeling that we are the only one that is and has ever gone through something is Satan, the adversary or evil at its core. Whatever you choose to call it. We are not alone. God has made that so clear to me this week. I and others have prayed that God would bring other women into my life. Women who either have or are going through what I am. Women to share with. Women to pray with and will pray for me. A support system. My behavior has always been. When God brings me to that broken (teachable) state and he starts to move in my life, I back away and then hightail it out of there. Hightail it as fast as I can go. I dont want to be that kind of servant anymore. I want to stand strong and be found faithful when this crisis in my life is over. When I have finished going through this season in my life.
This morning I was crying and fitful inside myself with not knowing what to do next. Just not knowing what he wants or what I want. Feeling like I just dont know anything.
Now, I am Praising God for this because this is the place where I really, even though I have been a Christian since I was eight, find Him. I mean really find Him! His love is so huge for me!! He forgives everything before I even say it or before I even do it!! Trust has been a big issue for me ever since a family member abused me in a very personal way. So now I am learning and claiming Lord God I trust you!!! I trust you with everything!! I trust that YOU will show me the way. You will show me what to know!! YOU will show up for me in a way that I have no concept of. You are doing it now as I write in this blog!! You are doing things in my life that in no way shape or form could every be coincidental!! YOU are magnificant and an awesome GOD!!
How powerful are your lessons to me and I pray that I will continue to hear you!!
So ladies and also the guys out there please know that you are not alone!! Pray for your support circle to appear because it is in my life in a way I never thought possible!! He is working it out for me and I am so grateful!! He can do it for you too!!!!

I am Humbled

I am humbled. So much am I humbled and hope that I will continue to be humble. God has a way of humbling us just like we humble our own children!! I am continually grateful to him!! I praise him above all else. Yes, I even drop to my knees and praise him with my face on the floor, my love is so great!! All else has been stripped from me. It takes what it takes to get us to this point. Why as humans do we continually think we can navigate our lives without him? I have crashed countless times and return to him scrapped bruised and broken.

Life is so precious and I am so grateful for my family. We and our animals which make up our family are so fragile. Thursday night our dog Pierre, which we rescued from someone who was neglecting him terribly and I believe abused him horribly, was hit by a car on last Thursday night. The people did not even stop. Our dog was a small dog and they were going at a speed that I am sure they did not even recognize that they had hit anything significant. It reminded me very strongly that our cars are dangerous things that can cause great harm if we misuse them or are preoccupied while we are driving!! I implore everyone who drives to keep to the speed limit. Even if you are running late please pay attention. It may be one of your own love ones that may suffer because of your inattention. Yes, the shock has worn off and my heart is broken. I have cried a lot today and feel tired and worn out. This was the last straw of many hard things that have happened to me in the last month to six weeks. Yesterday at Church God blessed me so much and began to fill my heart with hope and love. I am beginning to not just see his presence but fill it ever slightly. All this time I know that he hasnt left me he was teaching me. Teaching me to trust him. I am still learning and most likely have to turn it all over to him many more times in my life. I do know that something big will happen out all of what he is teaching me right now. I just need to hang on and I am hanging on. Hanging on for dear life and will not let go!!

Here is a layout I did last night using my Grandma's House kit to make a memorial layout for my dog Pierre. I am thinking about having a 12 X 12 made and framing it for our family to hang up so he will always be a part of us. I miss him so. I know he is in a better place with no more suffering. He was suffering so with his skin which was not resolving and the DR. doubted that it would. He was old. Most of his life spent in great sorrow. I hope and pray we were able to lift that somewhat for him.



I am so grateful that I know without a shadow of a doubt that we will one day be re-united in heaven. What an awesome God we have. Awesome isnt even a good enough word. I will miss him until thing. My sadness right now is overwhelming.

On a happier note I also made a layout with my new kit. April's Rainbow. It will be available at Keep it Simple Scraps www.kisscraps.com as soon as it opens. It is a very spring like kit with beautiful colors. I wanted to showcase a picture of Marc and John Paul. I have tried to document their relationship and how they are changing as they grow up as wonderful brothers.




This picture was taken in December of 2008. Marc is in Iraq and is safe and sound as much as he can be over there. He is in his field of Medicine and is in charge of Sick call of about 200 or so people all together. I am so proud of him and his accomplishments at such a young age. Lots of responsibility for a 25 year old.

Thank you so much for stopping by and I am getting excited for the Grand Opening of Keep It Simple Scraps.

I also wanted to let you know that I am participating in a blog train that will be happening on April 3rd you can check back and pick up the paper pack for the above kit for free. I will be participating in Blog Trains now and then so make sure to check back here often so you dont miss out on the freebies i do decide to give away.

Hugs, Have a great Day and Happy Scrapping!!