About Me

I am a 51 year old woman who in the past few years have been through one thing after another. Even though I see God's hand in it all it has and continues to be a difficult road. I feel I cannot be the only person thinking and feeling the way that I do. Maybe not all of you and its not my intention to offend yet to help. So if you disagree then lets agree to disagree. This is the truth as it applies to my life and we could differ. This is my journey and I pray that in some way it may be helpful for you or someone you know. God Bless you all on your journey whatever it may be.

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Thursday, March 19, 2009

Today in my quiet time of prayer and study I had a revelation. God given I am sure since I never have and never will come up on my own something this huge!

A "light bulb" moment as Oprah so aptly puts it. It came to me that the reason why Satan has been after me ever since I became a Christian at 8 years old and has used some of my most tremendous weaknesses and negative issues in my life to his advantage and sadly to say I have fallen for most of them and especially the fight or flight response which for me is definitely flight! The reason is because I am and will become an even greater warrior for God and Jesus Christ!! God is using this time to mold me and strengthen me into someone of great resolve and he will use me in a huge and magnificent way to further his work here on earth. What a great thing huh? I love it, love it, love it!!! Today is and was a good day!! Satan is trying even at this second to try to undermine that and use that to have me self sabotage myself by saying whew!! It's over!! The dust is settling and life will get back to normal. Hmmm.... What is normal anyways. What I did decide to do is let tomorrow be tomorrow and not bring it into today. Be grateful for a good day today and the strength that comes from that. No fears today, No not knowing what to do or where to turn. For today. Tomorrow will take care of itself. Today I claim and claimed VICTORY over the adversary!! PRAISE GOD!!!

Tomorrow a very very dear friend of mine and two other beautiful women from my church will be coming over tomorrow and we may begin to get a game plan on how to simplify my life and get things de-cluttered and organized in my home so Satan cannot hold this over my head of why I am not good enough to treat myself to a day off. Or go out and have a few fun days a week. I need so desperately to get out of my home and do some things that I like, not errands but things that I like to do and also to spend time with my Christian friends. At the beginning of the week I was struggling with this whole process and even letting them come over at all. It is a humiliating process for me. A humbling one at the very least. Well, today Thursday the day before the are coming. I am feeling at Peace over the whole prospect. We may not get much accomplished physically tomorrow but I feel there will be some movement forward and that in itself will be a comfort for me.

Tomorrow is a new day and believe it or not I am anxious for it. Whatever it ends up holding. This hasnt happened in a very long time for me.

1 comment:

Terry said...

April, you're doing so well! Progress is being made, and that's sooooo fantastic! I hope today was wonderful for you and that you moved forward. How very much our Heavenly Father loves you!

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